Are you in a relationship with someone you still love but feel like it isn’t the way it used to be and want to know how to make your relationship exciting again? Don’t worry. Almost every long-term relationship goes through this phase, and the way you handle it either ends your relationship or makes it stronger than ever.
A relationship isn’t always super romantic, full of love and all fun and games like in the movies. There are arguments, disagreements, and other issues in a real relationship. Sometimes, the excitement fades over the year(s), and it doesn’t feel the same forever.
When a relationship begins, it can feel like the best thing ever. But after a while, it usually only goes down from there. The initial romantic phase is also called the honeymoon phase.
“The honeymoon phase is an early part of a couple’s relationship where everything seems carefree and happy. It usually lasts from six months to two years and can be marked with lots of laughs, intimacy, and fun dates.” Brides.com states.
So, is the honeymoon phase over, and there’s no excitement in the relationship anymore? We’ll give you tips on how to stop procrastinating, fix your boring relationship and ignite that flame again, so keep reading.
Signs of a boring relationship
When a relationship begins, it’s filled with many intense emotions. However, the feelings slowly fade when we get used to the relationship and the other person. It’s the way we, humans, are wired. And that makes us feel like the relationship is getting boring. But you can still be best friends and enjoy each other’s company without that spark.
You’ll have difficulty finding things to discuss, and sometimes you just sit there doing nothing. You’d be comfortable with each other and still spend time together, but in that time, you’d do very little to nothing. If these things happen, your relationship gets boring.
Sometimes you won’t even want to spend time with your partner or won’t find activities with them fun anymore and often get irritated by them, or you’ll like spending time with other people more. Whatever they do or say, they manage to get on your nerves. Well, this is one of the most common signs of a boring relationship. But don’t worry; it’s normal and happens to all of us sometimes.
A relationship gets boring when the partners stop putting in the effort, and here lies the key to fixing your situation.
Do you remember how much you cared about everything and how hard you tried to make your relationship work? You just don’t put in the same effort anymore. Unfortunately, you also stop caring about your partner’s activities, interests, and feelings. That’s what you need to focus on if you want to make things work.
Let’s get into it a bit deeper.
How to make your relationship interesting again
It’s normal for a relationship to decline and eventually get boring, but you can make your relationship exciting again. It’s not even that hard. So here are some ways to fix a boring relationship.
This is the first and the most crucial step. Communicate with your partner. Tell them how you feel about the relationship and work together to find the best solution. Also, remember to listen closely to what they say and want to change. You both need to be satisfied to be happy. You need a win-win situation. A relationship works only when both parties are putting in the effort. So before you take the other steps, talk to your partner about it because you can’t do it without their help.
Go on dates again
Relive the days when you were starting to know each other. Go on dates and make each other fall in love again. Or watch some movies and have a romantic dinner at home. Whatever that will help the two of you connect deeper. It’ll make you feel like a new couple again, and you’ll also have someone and something to look forward to and plan about, so you won’t be just sitting and doing nothing with each other all day.
Verbally express yourself
Let your partner know how much you love and appreciate them. Prove it to them with little things throughout each day. For example, tell them what you like about them and how beautiful they are, or prepare them a nice breakfast. Show your love and affection and how much they’re worth to you. It’ll definitely give them butterflies, and if they’re one of the good ones, you’ll get the same back.
Have some alone time
A relationship gets dull when you stop appreciating each other and start taking each other for granted. That’s normal when you spend so much time with the same person day after day. When you start feeling like that, try spending some time with yourself. Find some exciting hobbies and give yourself a chance to start missing your partner again.
Find fun activities that you both like
Plan some fun activities, something you once used to do. For example, solve a puzzle, play a board game, go hiking, cook something together or find a suitable hobby for couples. Frequently spending quality and fun time together will make your relationship much more enjoyable and exciting, and there’s a good chance you’ll learn something new. So avoid being lazy, and go for it.
Avoid phones when together
It’s not always possible, but try to keep the phone out of reach whenever you can. If you must be available most often, try to set a small time window in the day so that you’ll only focus on each other without any distractions.
We miss the beautiful stuff around us when we stick our heads to the phone screen. So instead, focus on the here and now and talk to each other. Get to know your partner – there’s always something new you can explore.
Social media and phone addictions are one of the main reasons people distance themselves from each other and break the relationship. Unfortunately, it’s also one of the primary sources of people’s unhappiness nowadays, so don’t fall into that trap.
Get professional help
If you have tried everything and nothing works, go to couples therapy. Please don’t be ashamed of searching for help; it can only do you good. Talking to a professional can help you identify the problems, and resolving those issues can help you make your relationship interesting again.
How to spice up your relationship
Even if you’re in a normal, healthy relationship, you can always spice things up to make them more interesting. So here are a few more tips on how to make the relationship more exciting.
Plan surprises for your partner. If they’re done right, they can be great. And if you do it on a special occasion, that’s like icing on the cake. But first, ensure your partner likes surprises and will be okay with that, as not everyone does. For example, my friend’s girlfriend didn’t talk with him for two days because he threw her a surprise birthday party. However, she explicitly said ‘no,’ and the doofus still did it, so I guess it’s entirely his fault.
We wrote about the best Valentine’s day surprises for your girlfriend; you can read it for inspiration and ideas for your next surprise plan.
Get intimate again. Hold hands while walking, hug each other from behind and give each other kisses whenever you can. Remember to cuddle on the couch and in bed before sleep or when watching a movie. Getting physically intimate brings you closer emotionally, so grab any chance you can. Pun intended.
Celebrate the special occasions like you used to. Your girlfriend’s birthday, your relationship anniversary, even the new year… celebrate them together and with passion. Planning these together and then decorating and executing will be a fun activity to do together, and it’ll also make your relationship much more interesting.
Remember to try new things or things you’ve always wanted to try. Go on a bit of adventure with your partner. Camping, hiking, skiing, or anything that interests you both. Spending quality time is the best way to fix a boring relationship and improve oneself in the process.
These were our takes on how to make your relationship interesting again. You must properly communicate with your partner and determine which approach works best for you.
Remember that every relationship is different, and your partner might not like what people, in general, like. So it’s up to the two (or more in some cases, I guess) of you to figure out which method will fix your boring relationship.
We wish you good luck on your journey.